"You should agree for a lower fee" is a completely understandable view we often hear from friends of our clients, normally. It is normally true. It is the actual Court hearings that normally cost the very large amounts of money and of course a Court hearing is a very good indicator of a complete failure to agree!
When shouldn't you agree?
When you don't want to. Don't be bullied into agreeing because you "should".
When fear of cost of divorce makes you. Ensure your divorce lawyer tells you charging rates in writing and regularly keeps you up to date on the costs position.
When you are giving up an entitlement of say £50,000 to save £5,000 in legal costs unless you want to, perhaps to avoid the stress and upset of an argument.
How to agree?
Be frank and open about your finances from the very start.
Consider counselling or divorce coaching to help you cope with the emotions constructively.
Talk to your lawyer about collaborative law
Try not to aim to "win". In fact, you will both lose.
Make sure you have full details of your spouse's finances so that you and your lawyer can feel safe about considering a good financial settlement.
Be prepared to take a divorce settlement offer you think is fair